Components of Resilience Part Three: Purpose

January 19, 2022

This article is part three of a three-part series covering the three components that we, The Center for Transforming Engagement, have identified that help people to remain resiliently flexible. (you can find parts two and three by clicking the links below)

1. Peers who offer a community of support;
2. Practices that contribute to health of body, mind, and spirit
3. Purpose in our work that meets meaning in our life’s
narrative.

It may go without saying that purpose is complex.

It’s layered in its living, it’s full of mysticism in its call, and most of us experience it with so much uncertainty in our daily walk.

Even if we cognitively “know better,” it’s easy to fall into the traps of how we think purpose should work, especially in Christian fields of work or cultural contexts.

We believe, on an emotional and embodied level, that purpose should be clear, singular, and divine.

These beliefs are affirmed through spirituality and scriptural reads.

I’m not jealous of Moses’s task, but I am jealous of his encounter with a talking flaming shrub that told him exactly what that task was, with some advice on how to accomplish it.

Our beliefs about purpose are also affirmed through culture.

This is perhaps clearest in biographies; I went through a biography kick when I was in elementary school, unfortunate timing for being such a formative period of building a view of purpose combined with narratives written for third-grade reading comprehension. The stories are simplified, linear versions of how a life works.

Even in biographies that attempt to address such complexity, it’s challenging to fully take in the reality of what someone was living through because we see it through the lens of their impact. I was recently reading Becoming by Michelle Obama in which she tries to convey the uncertainty, challenges, and risks of the major life choices she made. Still, I was aware of how much my own thoughts got in the way: she must have known she was marrying a man who would have a global impact, that she would become a widely influential First Lady in both politics and culture, leading multiple initiatives. Even as I read about her doubts around working for city hall, I was reading it with the irony of who she becomes later in life. When the outcome of the story is known, it’s almost impossible to fully take in the challenges of unknowing, of trying to find a way forward when the path isn’t clear.

In conversations, it’s easy to fall into the same trap.

As we listen to the stories of mentors and professionals in our field, it’s easy to hear the stories of how they came to their work, how they found meaning in their life, how they live into their purpose each day, all told rather linearly. In the narration, it can seem as though they always had clarity, as though they always had a singular thread of a theme running through their interests and opportunities—or at most, a few threads that readily braided together.

What we forget is that these stories are told in hindsight, from the perspective of seeing which interests and opportunities were most significant, after years of rehearsal of that story in everything from deep conversations with close friends to small talk at professional events and cocktail parties. And we forget that language is linear in a way that embodied life is not.

Living in Purpose

As I’ve worked with the team of Resilient Leaders Project to build a process for ministry leaders to articulate and live into their purpose, we’ve come to realize that, in order for someone to be resilient in their work, Purpose must contain three components. Because his work Man’s Search for Meaning has been so formative, I’ll illustrate with Victor Frankl’s life for each.

First is the overarching purpose of a life.

The impact that a person has on the world over the course of a career, the outcome that we pursue with hope to see some increment of change in our lifetime and greater hope that the trajectory of that work will continue when we return to the earth. A calling. A vocation. This seems to be what people are most interested in discerning, the type of purpose in which people most often pursue clarity. For Frankl, who was trained as a psychologist before placement in German concentration camps, he knew his long-term purpose as a teacher of psychology. He imagined a future self and the impact he would someday have.

Second is the daily, mundane activities that help us cope with a single day.

Though they don’t directly contribute to overarching purpose, they contribute by keeping us going. They’re necessary in that they make the pursuit of long-term purpose tolerable by giving moments of joy, delight, comfort, or relief. Frankl shares stories of imagined conversations with his wife, observing a beautiful sunset, or remembering details of his house and life before the war. Without these moments, he knows that he would have given up the will to live.

Finally, purpose must include meaning-making.

Taking the raw material of suffering, pain, and mistakes and finding the formative opportunities within those moments. It takes a strong faith and hope to trust that suffering will shape us, that what feels like failure is formation for wholeness, that pain has purpose. It takes an active prayer life to be in the midst of heartache or health crisis and ask God, “What are you doing with me, at this moment?” In Frankl’s extreme suffering, he knew he would redeem it by learning about the psychology of it and teaching others.

Interested in exploring purpose?

Resilience circles offer a unique, transformative journey of personal growth, connection, and resilience. Go here to get more information on resilience circles.

You can also download The Center’s valuable resource: The Resilience Report to explore more about the three components of resiliency.

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Leading During Polarizing Times
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Upcoming Virtual Summit
Leading During Polarizing Times
This FREE online event is designed for ministry leaders seeking practical tools, spiritual wisdom, and renewed strength to lead faithfully when your church community faces deep differences.
Full attendance and participation during all sessions are expected to complete the program.
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Please consider the schedule closely to ensure you will be able to participate in the virtual meetings, and block off your calendar to ensure your attendance. Should you have an emergency (illness, situations out of your control) that will impact your participation please email transforming@theseattleschool.edu
Time commitment:
Two hours one day per month for 8 months, dates to be determined by majority of registrants' availability and adjusted as needed during the first group meeting.
Your feedback is immensely valuable!
As an essential component of your participation in this program, we ask that you provide us with your honest, candid, and timely feedback in program surveys and conversations, and consider providing reviews or testimonials of the program for promotional use.
Code of Conduct:
The Center for Transforming Engagement strives for intentionality in the ways we relate to one another - how we as a team relate to each other, how we relate to participants, and how we hope participants will relate to us and one another. To that end, we hold cultural norms about the ways we interact with one another. Your participation in this program is contingent on your agreement to abide by these cultural norms. i. For growth to happen, we all need to be able to share about the deeper challenges we face. To provide that atmosphere of openness and support, you commit to not sharing personal information that is shared in program meetings. ii. In our interactions with each other and our communities, we practice the humility of not-knowing that is required to listen and discover. iii. Be aware of different cultural and characterological ways of communicating, and invite others’ voices. Respect theological differences: the river of Christian orthodoxy is wide, and while the streams of that river are distinct, they are not inherently better or worse. Even if you can’t respect the belief, treat the person with respect. iiii. We value both thoughts and feelings as valuable pieces of information that inform one another, and inform our learning and discerning together. iv. Be in the here and now (not mentally somewhere or some time else), with the people who are sharing their time and stories with you. Eliminate any distractions possible.
Fair Use Policy
All program content, recordings, and materials are the intellectual property of The Seattle School and may not be presented, distributed, or replicated. The Seattle School retains the copyright for all recorded content. Some print materials (PDFs, worksheets, journal prompts, etc.) will be licensed under Creative Commons: Attribution NonCommercial ShareAlike. Those materials will be available for download on our website, and may be used as long as the following conditions are met: (1) attribute to the Center for Transforming Engagement even if remixed/modified; (2) do not use for commercial (paid) purposes; and (3) anything you make that remixes or builds upon this material, you must also distribute under Creative Commons. More information on this license is available at creativecommons.org/licenses/by-nc-sa/3.0/
(scroll down and click agree) Full attendance and participation during all sessions are expected to complete the program. Please consider the schedule closely to ensure you will be able to participate in the virtual meetings, and block off your calendar to ensure your attendance. Should you have an emergency (illness, situations out of your control) that will impact your participation please email transforming@theseattleschool.edu Time commitment: Two hours one day per month for 8 months, dates to be determined by majority of registrants' availability and adjusted as needed during the first group meeting. Your feedback is immensely valuable! As an essential component of your participation in this program, we ask that you provide us with your honest, candid, and timely feedback in program surveys and conversations, and consider providing reviews or testimonials of the program for promotional use. 2. Code of Conduct The Center for Transforming Engagement strives for intentionality in the ways we relate to one another - how we as a team relate to each other, how we relate to participants, and how we hope participants will relate to us and one another. To that end, we hold cultural norms about the ways we interact with one another. Your participation in this program is contingent on your agreement to abide by these cultural norms. Confidentiality. For growth to happen, we all need to be able to share about the deeper challenges we face. To provide that atmosphere of openness and support, you commit to not sharing personal information that is shared in program meetings. Curiosity. In our interactions with each other and our communities, we practice the humility of not-knowing that is required to listen and discover. Respect differences. Be aware of different cultural and characterological ways of communicating, and invite others’ voices. Respect theological differences: the river of Christian orthodoxy is wide, and while the streams of that river are distinct, they are not inherently better or worse. Even if you can’t respect the belief, treat the person with respect. You are invited to be a whole person, with both thoughts and feelings. We value both thoughts and feelings as valuable pieces of information that inform one another, and inform our learning and discerning together. Presence. Be in the here and now (not mentally somewhere or some time else), with the people who are sharing their time and stories with you. Eliminate any distractions possible. 3. Fair Use Policy All program content, recordings, and materials are the intellectual property of The Seattle School and may not be presented, distributed, or replicated. The Seattle School retains the copyright for all recorded content. Some print materials (PDFs, worksheets, journal prompts, etc.) will be licensed under Creative Commons: Attribution NonCommercial ShareAlike. Those materials will be available for download on our website, and may be used as long as the following conditions are met: (1) attribute to the Center for Transforming Engagement even if remixed/modified; (2) do not use for commercial (paid) purposes; and (3) anything you make that remixes or builds upon this material, you must also distribute under Creative Commons. More information on this license is available at creativecommons.org/licenses/by-nc-sa/3.0/